Are you Dating?

I work with many couples who are struggling in their relationships. Some have been married for over 20 years and others are just getting started in their relationship. A common theme I see is that married couples are no longer dating each other. They may be spending many evenings on the couch together or sitting in the same room both on their phones. They might be going out together with other friends or spending time with family. These things are not bad things but the marriage needs focused time too! I encourage couples to set aside at least 2 times per month to go on a date together, just the 2 of them. Try a new place for dinner or go back to an old favorite. Ask each other questions other than "how was your day". Think back on those dates you had together before and try to ask similar questions - even if you think you know the answers. Have fun! Do an activity together - play golf together, see an art museum or take a walk. Anything that gets you face to face or interacting with each other is great date material. The goal of date night is to do something fun together, get to know something deeper about each other and to connect. If we aren't feeding our marriage regularly, struggles are bound to come. When we are nurturing our relationships it creates a bit of a buffer for the harder times. If your marriage is not where you'd like it to be and you've tried going on dates together but things are difficult, consider marriage counseling. It is a great investment in your relationship!